Long day at work, groggy and loopy, disclaimer finished.
[EDIT] -Bear Cavalry
-Add a game feature or quest that changes the box art to reflect the game.
-Players should get to use two Sovereigns if they received a double shipment of the game by mistake.
-Put in a 'Ye Olde Mechanic' unit that can alter game mechanics from within the game, then take a long holiday.
-Create a quest where you have to find a male frog and try to misinterpret his dialogue and read too much into it.
-Add in a cheat where if you type 'Old man, you seek the Spell of Mastery.', Elemental exits and launches MoM in DOSBox.
-Make it so that all Sovereigns share the same mana pool, and have to play 'Rock, Paper, Scissors' to decide who gets to regenerate each turn.
-Watchtowers should manufacture watches.
-Fishing as a food resource where the fish provide food returns based on the patented 'Juicy Sweetness' rating system by Smeagol.
-Players should have the ability to Give Karma to other Sovereigns through the Diplomacy screens.
-Milk should be listed as a sub-resource to Food, and needs to be watched constantly on a per-city, per-turn basis to check if it has gone bad. The Sovereign has to be in the city to personally inspect the Milk stores.
-Elemental should be free to all those who purchased Elemental before playing v1.1 after buying expansion 1.B if they didn't purchase Elemental before playing expansion 1.A.
-Admiral Ozzel should be punished for coming out of hyperspace too close to the Hoth system.
-In campaign mode, a *Spoiler Warning* should pop-up before any reveals or story progression.
-New terrain type - 'Carpet'.
-Terrain tiles should light up when the Sovereign walks on them, just like Michael Jackson in the Billie Jean video clip. The Sovereigns should also be singing Billie Jean as they walk.
-Units positioned in front of Archers should be subject to friendly fire. There should also be a percentage chance that a fight starts up as a result.
-Units trapped between enemy influence zones should be able to spend one turn maneuvering as though they were trying to get past laser security sensors.
-In tactical combat, Attack, Damage, and Defense should be combined into a single statistic and rolled with a 2 sided dice. A roll of '1' results in auto-fail, whereas conversely, a roll of '2' results in manual-fail. This is due to the real world problem associated with a 2 sided dice.
-Add in a nuclear spell that causes other Sovereigns to get nervous. The Sovereign researching or casting the nuclear spell can cleverly and diplomatically disguise it as just an 'Update Schedule' to avoid a backlash.
-Female Sovereigns should be able to research the 'Spell of Faking' for the win.
-The Master Quest should be to cause the game to crash and report the error.
-A message from The Bishop: "I foretold of your folly. These lands rightfully belong to the Church. And I will have them!".
-All your modding tools are belong to us!
-Redefine 'Multiplayer' to include AI opponents.
-Bastion should say my name.
-Organized Teleport. Units teleport at the same speed as the Sovereign, even if the Sovereign has Hyperwarp and those units only have Ion Drive.
-A mana pool should be something a Sovereign uses to drive other people's kids to school in.
-The casting cost of spells should be measured in Flower Petals.
-New Weakness Trait - 'Unhelpful Complainer'. Resource accumulation is slowed and morale suffers as the Unhelpful Complainer whips their soldiers during combat in an effort to explain to them that they mustn't die. -50.
-For added realism and immersion, the Sovereign should spend 2 out of 3 turns sleeping.
...... Feel free to add more. I'm about to drop off where I sit.
-Speech bubbles for NPCs with Tourettes Syndrome.
-Add in NPCs who have Tourettes Syndrome.
-New Equipment Slot - 'Hair clip'.
-Currency exchange system between Kingdom and Empire factions.
-Offspring should have a 9pm curfew.
-New Spell - 'Differentiate Spell'. This spell acts as an addon to existing spells and adds a random effect in addition to the standard effect of the spell. 'Differentiate Spell' can be be used to target 'Differentiate Spell'.
-We need a quest that allows our Sovereigns to know what magic is.
-New Spell - 'Mirror Image'. 1dN illusory images of target unit are created on adjacent tiles in tactical battle. The appearance of these images varies in accordance with the different types of funhouse mirrors. There is a 67.32% chance that the images become frightened of one another and disappear.
-Special fencing needs to be erected to prevent younger offspring from drowning in the Global Mana Pool.
-The image translators should work for the construct program, so the whole game will be displayed as scrolling XML code.
-New Spell - 'Returnification'. This spell attempts to return your troops to the nearest city, but ultimately fails.
-AI opponents should have a Chess mini-game to play while they wait for the Human player to 'End Turn'.
-New Quest - 'The Quest to end all Quests'. Makes it so that there are no more quests in the game.
-The Conquest Victory option should be described on the box or in the manual as such: 'To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women.'
-New Unit - 'The Mouthguard of Sauron'. He just really needed to have something cover those teeth.
-Bring back Firefly.
-New Plane - 'Arc anus'. (Too cheap?)
-New Unit - 'Stupid fat hobbit'.
-Greedo was secretly in love with Han Solo, and couldn't bring himself to hurt him.
-New City Enchantment - 'Levitating City'. The enchanted city rises 10cm off the ground. This spell incurs a once-off materials cost, as a single step needs to be placed before every outer door of every building to avoid lawsuits from people tripping over to get inside.
-New Weakness Trait - 'Gibson's Disease'. Your Sovereign develops a tendency to randomly spout racism and beat their spouses. You receive a penalty to diplomacy, fewer offspring, and the ability to know what women want. -30.
-Magic Stamps. Rather than being imbued, champions line up at the Magical Welfare office once every 7 turns to receive allocated 'Magic Stamps' from the Sovereign. The stamps will be fluorescent pink.
-To make tactical combat more interesting, have some random units begin combat within enemy ranks, but facing their own side. It should take 1dN combat turns for them to figure out their mistake, until which they will fight for the enemy.
-Sovereigns should communicate through two cups tied to a long piece of string.
-New Race - 'Vegetarian Cannibals'. They're not vegan though, so they can still eat dairy made from their women's breast milk. (Too gross?)
Add a 2 handed weapon called "The Chainsaw of Ophidian".
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