Does a bear doo doo in the woods?

Do bees make honey?   

So if a bear doing doo doo in the woods discovers nearby bees making honey, does he interrupt his dump for a feed, or does he wait 'til all the paperwork's done before getting stung?

Can the bear in the woods eating honey while taking a dump tell the difference?

Will the bees care?  Or will the bees make him get another out house or dining area?

Will the bee have a big todo with the bear in the outhouse or out the inhouse?

If you go from your inhouse to your outhouse and find it isn't vacant because there's a big effing bear having a bowel movement, do you say sorry for disturbing him and wait quietly outside 'til he's done, or do you have a sudden bowel movement upon discovering the bear then run like hell?

If you do have one after seeing the bear in the outhouse will they call you greased lightning for what you left behind or will the bear not catch you because he's too busy slipping on what you left behind?

Being that dog owners now have to use a pooper scooper when their dogs defecate, isn't it only right that park rangers do the same when bears sh!t in the woods?

What d'yer mean, left behind?  If you open the door to the outhouse to find a bear in there, the result of your sudden fright is gonna  be in your underwear rather than left behind in a steaming pile as you run like the clappers in the opposite direction.

Playing silly buggers on the way?

Maybe, but what I wanna know is, if a bear is using the outhouse, has a park ranger trained it to do so because he doesn't wanna be bothered carrying a pooper scooper?

Just think. If this were Jurassic Park would he have a big enough pooper scooper or would a front-end loader be necessary? As opposed to a ... ahem ... back end ... loader?

Um, would anyone even take a job as pooper-scooper-upper in Jurassic Park, for fear they might be in the next load?

Is it spring yet?

If you had a spring in your step would you be a pogo stick?

Not one of my goals in life. Wouldn't one rather be a lawyer?

Don't they shoot lawyers when in Rome?

Is that why Rome fell?

All the lawyers skeedaddled?

Was it Brutus who snitched?

Did Caligula get his bum rubbed with hot rum?

Was he a dandy?

Whassa dandy?

Better question. Why does the page jump to page one every time I submit a response?

Could it be your pc isn't a dandy?

Maybe you need a lawyer?

So, you'd rather be a lawyer defending unwholesome characters and other miscreants in a dingy courtroom than a trend setting pogo stick who's jet setting and gallivanting around the world?

Rome fell because Nero was too busy fiddling... and not with a violin as history would have you believe.  Nah, he was in the parlour fiddling with pre-pubescent boys and girls.

Maybe it's because it knows you're a history buff and wants to take you back to where it all began?

Would Uvah need a lawyer if his PC filed an assault charge?

Nero is a zero.

So if you got the good guy off [legally speaking, that is], would you hop down to the nearest bar on your pogo sticks to celebrate?

You can go on your pogo stick while I take my Lexus, cuz it's freedom time for the  good guys?

Can you feel the luv?

What is this love, you speak of?

You can take your Lexus whilst I, on the other foot, take my brand spankin' new nine month old lappy and make stuff that'll make your Lexus look like last years Edsel. Why? Well ... because I have a vivid imagination and can create all kinds of stuff that doesn't use fossil fuels or electricity or any of that archaic nonsense. Besides, while I'm exercising my fantasy wishes here, pogo sticks are non-polluting, exercise oriented, keeps you awake, don't cost much, never need inspections or oil changes. Never get flat tires or need roadside assistance. Can go anywhere almost any which way ... and

should I stop now?