Females of JU - I need your advice!

hehe... yeah, suck it up!

from JoeUser Forums
Ok, here is the deal...

I have a good friend, she is the best chick in the whole wide world, bar none, and we get along soooo well... She has a boyfriend though, and knows this is the reason I dont keep in contact... every now and then though, I will send her an email, and the feelings come flooding back...

She knows how I feel, make no mistake, and if boy was out of the picture, well... you get the drift... but she is really pressuring me to catch up with her...

This is where the advice comes in handy... I want to jump her bones... what are some little measures I can use to test if she would be receptive of my advances?

Chicks will be the death of me... her bf is big as well, he could beat me up... but I cant help it I am naturally charming!!!

BAM!!!
5,330 views 45 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
You're kidding right? You want advice on how you can "feel" this girl out (bad choice of words maybe) about whether she'll be receptive to you wanting to "jump her bones"
Even though you know she has a boyfriend - who could possible kill you.

And you've been told she just wants to be friends??
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
hehe... it sounds stupid doesn't it!!!

I need advice, because frankly, I think I have a chance... but i need to know how to make sure I have a chance? you follow me?

at least you see why I need advice! I am hopeless!

BAM!!!
Sins of a Solar Empire II
Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
can I chime in even though I'm not a chick?
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top
haha.. you already did!

go for it bro... yours is an opinion i trust and respect!

BAM!!!
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top
Just talk to her, become her friend. The best way (I've found in my limited experience) is to just become good friends with the girl.

If she says no, then she (possibly) wasn't meant for you. It's that simple. If she does want to become "more than friends" (bone-jumping buddies even) good for you. If not, shrug it off (I know it's hard, but it's possible, I've done it at least twelve times in my life) and just get on with your life.

Here's the best way to figure out if you and her will actually get along. If you enjoy the same things, it'll be that much easier.

You play video games? So does she? Awesome.
You write? She writes? Awesome
You and her read books? Awesome

Just try to find something you both enjoy doing, either by asking her or talking to her friends, and invite her over or out a couple of times as friends to hang out. If she is having trouble with her boyfriend (I know rebounds suck) then she'll turn to you, her sensitive, caring friend. It's that simp-diffic-err, nevermind. It's hard, but just try to work the game as best you can. I know you got game (cue bad rap music)..... BAH! Evil rap! (flails his arms and counters with some Jimmy Eat World, Rufio, Reggie and the Full Effect, and Thrice). HAH!
Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top

if you jump her bones while she still has a boyfriend, then isn't it likely that someone's feelings are going to get hurt? i.e. her boyfriend?


is that inline with the 'Awagrian' way?  (did I spell that right?)


Stay away from the girl... wait till she's single brother

Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top
- I know... but anything i can do to get her in the single state of mind, I will be trying it...

Zimmy, This chick is one of my bestest friends... we both understand each other...

Thanks for your help guys... i suppose i will just go with the flow!!!

BAM!!!
Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top

but anything i can do to get her in the single state of mind, I will be trying it


so you want to get her into the single state of mind... why?  so you can make her un-single again?  just so you can sleep with her?  c'mon man... you're a better dude than that...


remember this rule of thumb when dealing with chicks with boyfriends... they'll leave you the same way you found 'em... if she'll leave her boyfriend to hook up with you, what's to stop her from leaving you for someone else? 


been down these roads my friend... no good is going to come from it if she breaks up with him to hook up with you...

Reply #9 from JoeUser Forums Top
what he just said.

few legal chemicals improve sex like adrenaline but at the end of the day, you're likely to wind up with a worn-out adrenal gland as well as a broken heart.
Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top

oh, cinderella ... *sigh* ... must i teach you everything ? .

it seems that you have fallen for her because you were able to do so from the safe distance of "friendship" instead of ahem, "jumping her bones" from the beginning. you like her so much because you both know and respect her ?. *shock, horror*

and besides, i venture to suspect that her unavailability gives her more value to you in this respect - it is possibly a trait in your personality to have to "strive" for things. there is sometimes no other way to make a selection from the (pardon me) vast array on offer.

learn to ignore it, for now anyway. it won't be the last time it happens to you. as you get older, the proportion af "attached" people gets higher, and it will only get worse. i'm such a comfort.

failing that, i suggest you learn to enjoy it. (in a chinese-water-torture kind of way).


mig XX
Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top
Yes, my theory of getting good advice when asked for has been proven!!!

What excellent guinea pigs you all are...

MJ - I just know I am better than her current bf... but yeah - I will just patiently observe from the sidelines... I had the notion of being selfish, and just continuing to ignore her, so i dont feel the pain of lust...

It's all character building i suppose - I will take her out for drinks, dinner, and a movie, and i guess I will go where the force takes me... I trust myself not to do anything stupid, and looks like you guys trust me that much as well...

This chick, I have felt like this since i met her... 2.5 years ago. We connected straight away... at the time, I was with my ex, and she was also with a bf, but the connection was still there none the less... I wouldn't be surprised if i married this girl... but for now, we must let fate decide!

Thanks

BAM!!!
Reply #12 from JoeUser Forums Top
damn

dat mignuna woman...she gots da power
Reply #13 from JoeUser Forums Top
So ...what if you do get to jump her bones?

Do you want a relationship? ..... and if so ...how can you trust someone who would let you jump her bones while she has a boyfriend?

Jess
Reply #14 from JoeUser Forums Top
Muggaz i think you should attempt to mount her old boy, do not concern yourself about her boyfriend as taking another mans woman is the mark of a true man.
Reply #15 from JoeUser Forums Top
Do you want a relationship? ..... and if so ...how can you trust someone who would let you jump her bones while she has a boyfriend?


Thats what she always said to me as well... If she ever cheated on her BF with me... how could i ever trust her?

and yes, with this particular girl I would enter into a relationship... she is pretty darn special...

Sir Peter, if going with the flow somewhat involves mounting said young lady, i shall have no aprahensions whatsoever!

BAM!!!
Reply #16 from JoeUser Forums Top

Muggaz, are you sure this isn't a case of yearning for the forbidden fruit?  You want her because she's with someone else...and as soon as she becomes available you lose interest?


Is she living with this guy?  How long have they been together?  I ask because to me, if the attraction was as strong as you say it is and if there were no strings attached, I would have thought that you and she would have found a way to be together by now....


..just my 2 cents worth.

Reply #17 from JoeUser Forums Top

Ok I just want to clarify the comment about the best way to bed a girl is to befriend her.  Yea, here's the deal on that...if we aren't interested, you can try your damnest to be our bestest-best friend, and it still won't allow you access to our pants. 


As for the girl...I'm with Dharma and Mignuna on this one...I think it's all about wanting what you can't have...

Reply #18 from JoeUser Forums Top
Muggaz... good luck.

There's another spesh??

~Anne
Reply #19 from JoeUser Forums Top
My thoughts? I know I'll get critisized for how naive I am, but I'm gonna say it anyway...

IF IT'S MEANT TO BE, IT'LL HAPPEN!!!

I know Muggaz disagrees and all, cuz he's "in charge of his fate"...but whatever. That's my advice.

Trinitie
Reply #20 from JoeUser Forums Top
If you really like this girl then if you're ever around her watch how she acts and the things she says. Or the next time you see here maybe you'd want to have a couple of friends nearby to see if they think she likes you. That's usually how I know that a guy likes me, usually my friends come up and say to me that they know he likes me because they can tell. But I don't know for sure if it works that way with guys or not. Obviously I wouldn't know that since im not a guy. If you're so charming like you say that you are maybe your charm will eventually work its magic on this girl. And if she doesn't want a relationship maybe it's because she doesn't want anything to happen to the great friendship that you guys have together. Well I hope my advice has been helpful to you!

~carebear~
Reply #21 from JoeUser Forums Top
Muggaz ... if she is special and you care for her ..you should want her to be happy.

I am guessing her boyfirend makes her happy and she loves him very much or she wouldn't be with him.

Sometimes, even though it is hard ..if you love someone ...you step back and put what's best for them first ...even though it hurts you.

Maybe stay her friend and wait for things to run thier course with her boyfriend.

I also agree with the girls ... are you sure it's not just because you can't have her?

Goodluck my friend.

Jess
Reply #22 from JoeUser Forums Top
Chicks will be the death of me


hehehe.... I don't really think you need advice, Mug. But it's obvious you've got our support! FC, baby!
Reply #23 from JoeUser Forums Top
Thanks Ladiez!!!

Ok I just want to clarify the comment about the best way to bed a girl is to befriend her. Yea, here's the deal on that...if we aren't interested, you can try your damnest to be our bestest-best friend, and it still won't allow you access to our pants.


Shades, thanks for saying that, just in case any other guys read this, because I know this, but a lot of guys dont... Once a chick has decided she isn't attracted to you, the only thing you can do to win that attraction, is basically not be mean, but yeah, certainly do be a softcock wussy!

You guys have all been so helpful in your own special little ways, and I know exactly how I am going to approach the situation... even if nothing happens, I am confident I can at least have her thinking about it... without even saying a thing! and thats all i need!

You are all playing your part into the development of 'Superstud Muggaz'!

hehe

BAM!!!
Reply #24 from JoeUser Forums Top
oh, and just to clarify... The attraction is not because I cant have her... thats propostorous! I am attracted to her because she is beautiful in every single way... She has the best personality, is extremely smart, and has a smile to die for!!!

If you're so charming like you say that you are maybe your charm will eventually work its magic on this girl


hehe... damn straight!

I am guessing her boyfirend makes her happy and she loves him very much or she wouldn't be with him.


I know for a fact that this isn't the case... well, not all the time... She used to whinge about him to me all the time, and i flat out told her that I wasn't interested in hearing her sad stories about him, because I could make it all better... she has since stopped talking about him whenever she talks to me, and let me tell you, she has become far more responsive to me since...

Thats another free lesson for all - guys, dont ever listen to a girl whinge about her boyfriend to you, because she still goes home to him, and you are merely her intellectual whore!!! for more information - visit here for the Ladder Theory This website explains a hell of a lot!!!

BAM!!!
Reply #25 from JoeUser Forums Top

You are all playing your part into the development of 'Superstud Muggaz'!


Yup, I find that scary...very very scary.


Thats another free lesson for all - guys, dont ever listen to a girl whinge about her boyfriend to you, because she still goes home to him, and you are merely her intellectual whore!!!


well said.