Can anyone tell me what a good build order is? I am a noob and losing way to much :)

Avoid relying on build orders. This game completely depends on what you need. Every map is different and you cannot always play the same way. 

i.e. If you always do a magic build you are going to hurt if there is no decent essence cities. 

Here is a few early game strategies.

However, generally I build a cleric or the tower first. Most of the time I build the cleric. Once you build that you just need 1 fame point from clearing a camp to get your first hero. 

HERO AND UNITS

Separate them for 10 turns or so to explore then gather then up and build scouts. You want to find early goodies and your second city location as soon as possible. Avoid early combat. Generally avoid anything too big until you have an army. Weak or Medium difficulty (stick to weak if you can though)

TAXES

SET TO NONE! Don't raise taxes unless you have to. You can get by for a long time. 

RESEARCH

This is not the exact order.

Research first 3 techs then trade for the civilization tree.

In the magic tree research the ability to make shrines. 

In the warfare tree get leather armor. 

Then research whatever. 

UNITS

Full Leather Club Men as soon as you can. Just need a few. Early on build enough units to SURVIVE. Focus on your economy. 

Research Civics first unless you have oppression. The bell tower is best production building unless you can build on clay pit. Once you can't get the full benefit of a Bell Tower then the other options are better. 

Early on build up your production abilities. No pioneers until your first town is level 2. Then toss in a pioneer as soon as they become avail until your unrest is getting out of hand (try to st ay below 20% unrest the early game)

SPELLS

Buff your cities.

Buff your units. 

Don't waste mana on nukes. Until you have some shard shrines the buffs and debuffs are better than nukes.

CITIES

Balance towns, conclaves and fortresses. Generally I make a set of each before adding more of one type. 

Need gildar - towns

Need units - fortress (2 or 3 essence cities)

Need research - conclave (1 essence at least, use your high essence cities for fortress first though)

Good advice above. However, I'll give you the first four things I will usually build when they are available:

Logging Camp (only available if your city is next to a forest)
Workshop
Study (I might swap this with Workshop if I have a Logging Camp built)
Bell Tower (I might move this up depending how bad my unrest is)

Quickly research the first-level Civilization techs (Restoration, Knowledge, Civics) so you can build the above buildings.

It sounds like I might be a little more aggressive early with my sovereign and two initial units (the three fighting together) than Illauna is. Not saying one way is better--just a matter of style. However, either way, don't initiate early combat that you aren't sure you can win.

Usually, my first settlement is a fortress, then city, conclave, city, city.

Good luck!

What Coyote said. As soon as your city hits lvl 2, train a Pioneer.

Basically, build all tier 1 buildings before moving on. Build on all resources asap. Train many, many Pioneers. And some more. Make sure all your cities are connected.

If you have a hard time beating the game, check the forums for other 'advice' threads. Or you can post your current experience (your Sov and Faction and how you are doing) and people can give you specific tips.

You need to reach a certain advanced military unit. That should be your main goal. So you establish new cities, with only one goal in mind: research of that one military unit. I would suggest you spend 1 hour figuring out where to locate your cities. The best places to build cities is near lakes and forests. So you get the food improvements, ports, harbors and you get the forest improvements, logging camps, sawmills etc. that you can all build in a single city. Food is very important: you need to build cities that have as much food as production in the city details menu.

The best cities to establish early on would have:

1 or 2 river tiles next to the city, 1 or more forest tiles and say farms or clay or iron. That combination would give you a superb city. So I would suggest study how to build cities early on. You can raze and restart your first city unlimited amount of times - so practice and see in the city details area which cities placed where produce the best combination of food and production. The research / science depends upon the population, so food is as important as production.

Research the first 3 civ techs

Build a second pioneer when your first city hits a population of 60.

Build bell tower (and cleric if available)

Build Study.

Buiild as many militia that you can afford.

Your second city, ideally should be a fort.

The key to keeping the AI off you back as long as possible is to ramp up your power ratiing, and keep it at least level, if not higher, than the AI.

With the AI at bay, you'll have time to level up.

My initial units are not separated for more then 4 turns. Just enough time to spot your second town, find enemy camps, easy to grab treasure, and early quests. You generally want to start clearing the early creeps as soon as possible. 

There's already another thread on the first page with even more newbie tips.

Generally the math works cleric first for early hero. Logging camp as soon as you can but do not delay the bell tower. The bell tower is the best production building unless you have less than 10% unrest. Always build clay pits before production per material buildings. Studies should be built in every town if you can. Don't slow down progression building too many early units. How many to build depends on your difficulty. Generally, you want to have enough to clear all weak and medium creeps without losses. The first and second cities should be Fort or Conclave. It doesn't matter that much which you pick first. You generally will end up in equal turn advantage either way. I personally try for fort first. You don't need your first town up and running until your gildar is low. Even then a market in your early towns can help a ton. 

For tiles 3/3/3 is the best you can find for a fort. 4/3/2 almost as good. 1 essence towns are good for conclaves. You can do higher essence towns but forts should get your biggest essence tiles for the end game. I have crap luck so I havent fully figured out how the logging camp or pier comes into my build. I like having them but I rarely get a city or forest close enough and still have a good settle location. 

I always go logging camp first if available as it only take 2-3 turns to build (bell tower is 4 I think).

Also unless I know the map I make a scout very early on (a redesigned one with the stealth trait unless it's a racial trait already).

My first action is to cast hammers spell (if I have earth magic and at least 1 essence in the village), then logging, then often a scout, then sometimes workshop.

That is a lot of production for only 10 turns in...and it means you can get everything else so much faster...