just a thought: whatif the community can help with that multiplayer option?
how about including a 'testenviroment-switch' where we can use the buggy multiplayer, and enhance ist ourselfs - or at least test it.
i played civ 5 ffh often with friends - and there where times where OOS Errors happend very fast. the solutions varied from no event option or excluding special races (kuriotates) etc. etc.
but even with the buggy multiplayer we played often until the point where oos occured regulary - and somtimes didnt.
and while playing together we could give some very good balancing tips - also useful for single player / difficulty settings.