Banned for playing trivial games with the life of the party

Banned for partying with lifers.

Banned for lifers at your party in the first place.

banned for obscure relevance 

Banned for irrelevance and obscurity in a one dimensional kind of a way.

Banned for quoting Theory of RubberBand.

Banned for the Theory of Respectability.... a behaviour model that exists in so very few places these days.

banned for being among the few

Banned for being one of the few among the banned who keeps coming back to give his two cents worth [eg: a piece of your mind] and leaving with change.

Banned for incomprehensible statements made under duress during a beating with wet noodles.

Banned for revealing things that should ever remain unspoken just because somebody slapped your bare botty with a soggy tram ticket.

Shame on you for caving in before the whack across the shins with a knotted shoelace was due.

banned for knotting the shoelace and not trying to get it out

Banned for going down the rabbit hole to retrieve 5c.  You do realise that's how the Grand Canyon go started back in the day, don't you?

Banned for falling into an event horizon without a flashlight.

banned for flashing the light towards the horizon

Banned for flashing in a fog.

banned for being bogged down in the fog without a good log

Banned for going for the stump rather than the trunk.

Banned for putting the stump in the trunk and leaving no room for luggage or those bodies destined for a discrete burial out in the remote desert.

Banned for sand in your knickers.

banned for not realizing that it is not only sand in those knickers

Banned for binoculars and spying from a distance on knickers wearers with a sore butt from sand rash.

Banned 'cause flood insurance doesn't cover knicker overload.

Banned for an insurance reference when some calamine lotion or Vaseline Intensive Care is all that's needed.

Also banned for volunteering to apply sunscreen lotion to the topless bather... he was not impressed.

banned for not impressing the topless bartender