so, you want to work in australia ?

http://www.loserturdmafia.com/

September 23, 2004 9:16 AM from

Here are some things you may wish to do during your working holiday to my homeland. Yes, they’re real jobs.

Jackaroo:

Your duties will be stock work associated with lamb and cattle production, with all mustering done on 4-wheel motorbikes. Your own working dogs or experience with dog handling would be preferred. HR licence would be an advantage. Electricity and meat will be included in your salary package.

Ringer:

The position involves stockwork and all mustering is done with helicopters. It is essential that applicants are competent with horses and cattle. It is preferred that you have a truck licence and own car. Single male accommodation is available.

All rounder :

25,000 acres of dryland broad acre cropping and beef production. Seeking applicants with competent horse riding ability, stock handling skills and farming experience including the operation of 4WD tractors, air seeders and 50ft implements. On farm accommodation provided including paddock for your horse.

Moon Buggy Operators :

Required to work around Emerald and Moree. Positions start in early February and March. Accommodation is provided. Experience is required, this position is ideal for travelers.

Stationhand Couple :

22,000 acre breeding operation. Runs 1200 head of breeders. Assist with hay production, fence/water maintenance. Must be competent with horse riding and shoeing. A truck licence would be essential. A 3 B/R cottage available with meat.

Hmmm. Visa application, anyone ?

humor

9,099 views 11 replies

Reply #1 September 23, 2004 10:57 AM from

JoeUser Forums Top

A 3 B/R cottage available with meat.

I just have to ask, is that a typo, or does it really come with meat? How much and what kind?

Reply #2 September 23, 2004 4:05 PM from

JoeUser Forums Top

I just have to ask, is that a typo, or does it really come with meat?

it really comes with meat, citahellion !

How much and what kind?

i have no idea !. i'd assume red meat from the station cattle ?. hehe

"Electricity and meat will be included in your salary package".

... that one was in the jackaroo job, so it seems to be a fairly common phenomenon !

mig XXX

ObjectDock - Access shortcuts and frequently used applications from an animated dock.

Reply #3 September 23, 2004 4:41 PM from

JoeUser Forums Top

.. because you know, I love meat. A job that provides me with meat as part of my compensation package would be pretty cool.
Well, except for the parts about working with animals. I'm not an animal husbandry kind of guy. I like my animals pre-slaughtered in nice, neat frozen aisles at the store.

But if they need somebody to run their network and build applications that keep track of how much meat they've processed and what cuts they got and so forth, I could handle that.

Reply #4 September 24, 2004 6:17 PM from

JoeUser Forums Top

What the heck is a moon buggy?
I can drive pretty much anything, so....

Reply #5 September 24, 2004 8:21 PM from

JoeUser Forums Top

I'm not an animal husbandry kind of guy. I like my animals pre-slaughtered in nice, neat frozen aisles at the store.

icky. me too, citahellion hehe

But if they need somebody to run their network and build applications that keep track of how much meat they've processed and what cuts they got and so forth, I could handle that.

err, they'll get back you you

What the heck is a moon buggy?I can drive pretty much anything, so....

ssg geezer, actually, even i don't know that !

mig XX

Reply #6 September 24, 2004 8:33 PM from

JoeUser Forums Top

Well, except for the parts about working with animals. I'm not an animal husbandry kind of guy. I like my animals pre-slaughtered in nice, neat frozen aisles at the store.

cita,

See, this is the beauty of it. You don't HAVE to be good at animal husbandry, simply be able to keep them ALIVE until slaughter. Personally, I am listing my experience with sea monkeys on my resume as "25 years of experience handling livestock".

As for taking care of them, well, basically, you fatten them up, right? So I'm figuring you fatten cattle up just like you fatten people up and will raise them on a 3 big mac and shake diet until they're ready for slaughter. If we need to keep a few of 'em lean, I'll just eat their portions myself.

So, whaddya think, folks? I'm a shoe in, right?

Reply #7 September 24, 2004 11:09 PM from

JoeUser Forums Top

Personally, I am listing my experience with sea monkeys on my resume as "25 years of experience handling livestock".

a fabulous example of 'creative licence', gid. i thoroughly approve !

again, i applaud your creativity, gid. as long as the job gets done, who cares how ? anyway, that diet can't be any worse than the anti-biotics they feed 'em now, right ?

So, whaddya think, folks? I'm a shoe in, right?

we would be proud to have you, gid !

mig XX

Reply #8 September 25, 2004 12:41 AM from

JoeUser Forums Top

What the heck is a moon buggy?I can drive pretty much anything, so....

ssg geezer, actually, even i don't know that !

It's what they drive on the moon - you know, like in those dodgy B-grade movies and NASA footage. There's a big Mars research station out in the sticks where they practise driving these things around and pretending they're on Mars. I think it's like one of those historical recreation societies except with government funding.

Reply #9 September 29, 2004 8:05 AM from

JoeUser Forums Top

It's what they drive on the moon - you know, like in those dodgy B-grade movies and NASA footage.

thankyou, cactoblaster. i was hoping somebody would let me know

There's a big Mars research station out in the sticks where they practise driving these things around and pretending they're on Mars

the things that happen here ! amazing !

I think it's like one of those historical recreation societies except with government funding.

i think all our funding must go to stuff like that !

vanessa/mig XX

Reply #10 November 5, 2004 1:34 PM from

JoeUser Forums Top

Reply #11 November 5, 2004 1:34 PM from

JoeUser Forums Top

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