Available: One Slightly Used Cat

Available for immediate delivery:

One slightly used cat. Grey and white. Answers (when not engrossed by something new to sniff at) to the name "Fuzzy." Little over one year old, so relatively new. Has the following characteristics:

• Climbs drapes
• Destroys venetian blinds
• Will happily jump on your head while you are sleeping
• Is convinced bathroom sink is his one and only special sleeping area
• Sure to spend considerable time breaking into the one place he's not allowed
• Will do anything possible to prevent your forward momentum, including, but not limited to, sticking a claw into your sock and pulling
• Interprets "No!!!" as "Yes, dear, how terribly clever of you! Keep it up!"
• Will play with anything but the expensive cat toys pushed upon hapless customers by Wal-Mart
• Guaranteed to disrupt the last 3 minutes of any DVD or video (play practical jokes on your friends!)

Hurry before the final 3 lives are expended. If interested please contact current owner at Bellevue Hospital. Just be sure not to tell the administrators what you are there for, as there are still several beds available in the ward.