
  Comes with 2 non- rechargable D batteries and a
  gift certificate to purchase 2 more at twice the price.
  But wait, there's more!! This unique device comes with
  a clockwork motor for those times when you run out of 
  batteries and the store is closed.
  But wait, there's more!!! For those customers who suffer
  with arthritis, we will also include a powerful hamster wheel
  for just $9.99 [mouse or hamster extra] to power your device
  when you can't wind up the clockwork motor or get to the store.
  But wait, there's more!!!  Purchase this money saving device
  in the next 5 minutes and we will include a second absolutely
  free and pay your postage and handling.
  But wait, there's more!!!  If you tell a friend or relative of this
  amazing offer and they order within the next 5 minutes, we
  will send you on a world trip with Glugalug Cruises, whose fleet
  of magnificent liners is powered with our wondrous device.
  So, phone NoMoneyBackGuarantee Appliances today for your
  once in a lifetime opportunity to purchase a completely
  worthless piece of junk for the low, low price of just $1299.99
  plus tax.