Bear Cavalry vs. Pink Space Ponies. Who will win?

By on December 5, 2008 5:31:23 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

Lord Reliant

Join Date 03/2006
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Bear Calvary army vs. Pink Space Ponies army.  Who will win?

My vote- bear calvary.

This reminds me of an old SNL skit of Bill Swerski's SuperFans:

Bob: Ok Gentleman, the [bear cavalry] are preparing to defend their crown, and gentleman, the only question is not will they repeat, but how many times?

Pat: You know, I don’t think were talking a repeat, a three peat, or even a four peat.

Carl: That’s right, were talking a minimum eight peat.

:bear:

On a related note, why isn't there a bear emoticon?  There's already a frog, pig, cat, dog, and more.

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December 5, 2008 5:34:18 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

RAWR! RAWR! RAWR!

RAAAWWWR!

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December 5, 2008 5:45:39 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

If this fight goes on much farther, we'll all lose. I'm not doubting bear merits--heck, I'm a 'zoftig' gay man, a bit of a Poohist, and we all know that truth and bear scat have some sort of fundamental relationship, at least in the woods.

But enough, already. LR, Luckmann, you both have plenty of more useful things you need to be typing about around here. For example, even with all the extraneous bear-blather, the Animal Husbandry thread is darned interesting. Why not let the bears wander back off onto their own paths for a bit and focus on subjects that don't stir such intense feelings?

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December 5, 2008 6:08:59 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums
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December 5, 2008 6:13:50 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

Space Ponies since it was not an arbitrary thing created by egocentric guys. It was more genuine and creative.

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December 5, 2008 6:15:54 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

Quoting GW Swicord,
Why not let the bears wander back off onto their own paths for a bit and focus on subjects that don't stir such intense feelings?

At the risk of fanning the flames, I still can't believe that light-hearted bear jokes and ubiquitous use of bears in examples managed to stir intense feelings.

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December 5, 2008 6:27:37 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

See now, I'd say the victor is the 3rd party...   the necromancer riding puppies!

Honestly, a vs. contest (especially between those two) is a little silly.  In a fight who will win... a pink space pony or a bear....   well, that's pretty one sided.   Especially a bear with a armed soldier on top.  Sure the ponies could possibly retreat to space, but that still is losing in my book (retreat = defeat.  It even rhymes)

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December 5, 2008 6:29:39 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

Quoting pigeonpigeon,

At the risk of fanning the flames, I still can't believe that light-hearted bear jokes and ubiquitous use of bears in examples managed to stir intense feelings.

Human nature.  

Peace, brothers-in-Elemental.

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December 5, 2008 7:40:57 PM from Stardock Forums Stardock Forums

Quoting FlyGuy7,
Space Ponies since it was not an arbitrary thing created by egocentric guys. It was more genuine and creative.

I just find the whole thing funny to think about, and that some people have such an issue with the mere mention of it.

Back on off-topic-

If Stephen Colbert were here, how would he vote (he has an intense fear/hatred of bears)?

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December 5, 2008 8:31:07 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

Quoting Lord Reliant,
I just find the whole thing funny to think about, and that some people have such an issue with the mere mention of it.

Back on off-topic-

If Stephen Colbert were here, how would he vote (he has an intense fear/hatred of bears)?
If he's got an intense fear of bears, I'd say bears.

Pink Space Ponies just doesn't really.. do it for me. Y'know?

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December 5, 2008 8:58:01 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

Hello America,

I think it is finally time that truthiness prevails here. Bear calvery just does not make sense. First of all the bears would devour their riders as fast as you can say... manwich. Secondly bears are the Number One threat to America. I call for a ban on all bears in all video games. If you want them... then you can go to canada.

And remember to buy A Colbert Christmas: The Greatest Gift of All Album on iTunes.

Thank you America and Goodnight!

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December 5, 2008 9:14:26 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

Quoting TheStephenColbert,
Hello America,

I think it is finally time that truthiness prevails here. Bear calvery just does not make sense. First of all the bears would devour their riders as fast as you can say... manwich. Secondly bears are the Number One threat to America. I call for a ban on all bears in all video games. If you want them... then you can go to canada.

And remember to buy A Colbert Christmas: The Greatest Gift of All Album on iTunes.

Thank you America and Goodnight!

Who are you?!

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December 5, 2008 11:47:37 PM from Stardock Forums Stardock Forums

Quoting TheStephenColbert,
Hello America,

I think it is finally time that truthiness prevails here. Bear calvery just does not make sense. First of all the bears would devour their riders as fast as you can say... manwich. Secondly bears are the Number One threat to America. I call for a ban on all bears in all video games. If you want them... then you can go to canada.

And remember to buy A Colbert Christmas: The Greatest Gift of All Album on iTunes.

Thank you America and Goodnight!

OK.  Whomever added Stephen in here is brilliant.  I'm giving karma to Stephen just for that, but the person with the true identity should get 50.  That...was...awesome!

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December 6, 2008 3:40:26 AM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

*Waits for applause to stop* Thank you, thank you! Ameri- I mean "Lord" Reliant, thank you for admitting to the world that I am brillant. And I accept your karma and will add it to already impresive list of awards. Including my emmy's and we can not forget the Peabody.

But as far as true idenities go, I have no idea what you are talking about. I am Stephen Colbert, and now that I have said that, we know it to be true. And as long as there are forces of Evil who want bear calvery... I will be here. Because if bear calvery prevails what's next? Bear tanks? Bear airplanes? Bear thermal nuclear bombs? Alast I can not let that happen.

America, I am putting this out to you! Operation Humble Bears! You have prevailed in humbling Kanye West now it's time for the bears. I am calling all of you to destroy all bear paraphernalia that you can find. Teddy Bears, check. Care Bears, check. Bears AND Cubs jerseys, check. Ohh and Smokey were replacing you with Smacky the frog. 

So America, I'm counting on you.

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December 6, 2008 6:52:20 AM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

No, no, you got that wrong, it's "thermal nucular".

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December 6, 2008 9:38:09 AM from Stardock Forums Stardock Forums

Quoting TheStephenColbert,
Because if bear calvery prevails what's next?

This isn't the real Stephen Colbert- he would never mis-spell cavalry.  Imposter!

Actually, given this is mis-spelled, I blame someone at Stardock.

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December 6, 2008 10:07:46 AM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

Quoting Lord Reliant,

Quoting TheStephenColbert, reply 13Because if bear calvery prevails what's next?

This isn't the real Stephen Colbert- he would never mis-spell cavalry.  Imposter!

Actually, given this is mis-spelled, I blame someone at Stardock.

But Stardock always misspells it as calvary, not calvery. The plot thickens!

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December 6, 2008 10:28:09 AM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

Just wait for the calviry!!

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December 6, 2008 2:02:13 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

America,

I again must protest whenever I think of cavalry, Calgary amusingly comes to mind. Then I think of Canadia, with their glaciers in Toronto, and the freezing temperatures of Ottawa all year round and well it infuriates me. How come they don't get this "Global Warming"? But I am getting off subject.

To those who have pointed out my mistake, I applaud you. But only a little. I want to know what you have done for my Operation Humble Bears. Have you erased Goldie Locks from your memories yet? Have you broken your copies of all Bad News Bears VHS and DvDs? Have you done your part to get bears spayed or neutered? I want to know what you have done. Please post here.

Thank you America and Good Day!

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December 6, 2008 2:10:49 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

Quoting pigeonpigeon,

Quoting GW Swicord, reply 2Why not let the bears wander back off onto their own paths for a bit and focus on subjects that don't stir such intense feelings?
At the risk of fanning the flames, I still can't believe that light-hearted bear jokes and ubiquitous use of bears in examples managed to stir intense feelings.

I can't either, which is why I thought it might be time for some, ahem, hibernation.

If I didn't make it clear enough up front, I'm no bear-basher (even though I'm a huge Stephen Colbert fan--Emmy, please!). I gave Luckmann karma for the "bearomancer" tag the first time I noticed it in his avatar.

To try getting partway back to seriousness, aside from wanting to cut the bear-o-phobes some slack, I'm still so hungry for more concrete details about the project so far that it's frustrating to see a fresh post and find it is naught but another reminder that you should hang your food before you leave the campsite for a day hike.

p.s. How many of you have been anywhere close to a real bear in the wild? I once had a grown black bear pass less than 20 meters away from me, and I was *very* glad that it's path was pretty much perpendicular to the park trail that my friends and I were hiking. It was moving at full speed somewhere, and dense woods didn't seem to be any real drag on it.

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December 6, 2008 7:42:55 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

You guys are fogetting one important factor...Is the battle IN SPACE!!!!!

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December 8, 2008 2:31:19 AM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

Quoting StoweMobile,
You guys are fogetting one important factor...Is the battle IN SPACE!!!!!

YES! If it's in space, bad things happen to the bear! Otherwise, I put good money on the bear. Teeth. Claws. Rider probably in full plate just for the lulz. All this against the ability to survive hard vacuum, which is unsurprisingly only useful in a vacuum. Still, we should get koscy over here to remind us if we're forgetting the pink space pony killrays of doom or something.

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December 8, 2008 6:26:22 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

Why in space? I thought the space ponies lived on a planet, only being called space ponies because they are not on earth.

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December 8, 2008 6:39:50 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

Quoting Eplekongen,
Why in space? I thought the space ponies lived on a planet, only being called space ponies because they are not on earth.
But then what do they have the space helmet for?

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December 8, 2008 7:55:42 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

Damn had money on the bear to win and to own the rider too... but the proof of that picture with that damn pink space pony won god damn it lost more money...

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December 9, 2008 5:25:06 PM from Elemental Forums Elemental Forums

Quoting Luckmann,
But then what do they have the space helmet for?

 

Because it's very fashionable

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